Why Bananas are Cool

Bananas are cool because they are yellow. There are no other fruits that are yellow and as cool as a banana.

Monkeys like bananas. You like monkeys, don't you?

Bananas are also packed with vitamins and shit. By "shit" I mean "additional things that are good for you", not "shit". That would not have been a good selling point.

Plus they are shaped like dicks. So when a babe eats a banana, you can kind of pretend like it's a dick. But you have to kind of ignore it when they bite chuncks out of it.

When friends who are male have bananas you get to harrass them for having one. You get to make dick jokes and ask him why he packed his dildo for lunch or if he's testing his gag reflex or if he plans on eating that. And then he can run away and cry and think of a really good comeback but not think of it until much later in the night when he is at home and posts it on the internet.

If you are a guy and you bring a banana to work for lunch, a good cover would be to offer it to a female coworker in a suggestive mannor. "Would you like my banana?" wink-wink. nudge-nudge.

Wish I'd thought of that sooner.

*sniffle*